Tips for Going Clubbing for Men
I’m just going to say it right now, I hate clubbing. The music’s too loud, a lot of creepy guys are there, and people in my crew are always getting drunk. Not to mention that the club has its reputation as one of the hardest places to pick up women. However for all the negatives there are, I find myself going there every week. On a Saturday night, that’s where all the attractive women on.
Clubbing is what separates the men from the boys. You’re either one of the guys dancing with women on the floor, or you’re on the sideline with your Corona watching him. It’s difficult, but definitely possible.
1. Whoever approaches the most, leaves with the most numbers
When it comes down to it, clubbing is really just a numbers game. Some women come to the club just to dance with their girlfriends (while dressing like they want every guy to approaching them). It’s hard to weed out which girls are approachable and which are not. The best thing to do is to just grab your balls, and go for it. If you get rejected, then move on to the next girl. And don’t take it personally or let it ruin your night. If you approach a girl, you have a 50% chance of success. If you don’t approach, then you have 0%.
2. It’s all about Social Proof
Not only do people judge you by what you wear, but they also judge you by who you’re with. Who’s more attractive: The guy with a few girls at the bar taking shots with them, or the guy with his friends standing near the wall checking out the dance floor? I always try to take females friends along when I can. I like to dance with them at the beginning because it lets me scout the area to see who’s there, much better than walking around by yourself.
The majority of women that I meet are through people I already know in the club. After you start going there a while, you’ll get to know more people and start noticing a lot of the same groups go every week. When I enter I say hi to everyone I know, and usually they bring with them some friends. I get introduced and it’s game on, no need for the approach phase.
3. What to wear
Many clubs are strict when it comes to the way you dress entering the club. My friend gets in all the time for this one club wearing black converses, but he can’t get into another wearing the same thing.
The “safe” outfit – Black oxfords, dark socks, dark jeans, a button up dress shirt (top 1-2 buttons unbuttoned and you can roll up the sleeves to slightly below the elbows).
You can get into any club wearing this and you won’t look “bad.” But if you read my article on peacocking, then you know you want to look a little bit different from the standard. Personally I like wearing a t-shirt with an interesting blazer.
I know this is common sense, but please take a shower and wear some anti-perspirant before you go out. Also put on some decent cologne because you’re going to get close when you dance. My two favorites are Issey Miyake and Burberry Brit. If you don’t have a cologne, ask a female friend to help you pick one out at Sephora or Macy’s.
4. Have a good wingman
Women are never alone in the club. The best targets in my opinion are when two girls are by themselves. You can approach them by yourself, but the girl you’re with is not going to leave her friend to dance with you. That’s where having a good wingman can be helpful. Also wingmen can encourage you to to approach and help you rebound. I remember one time we had an approach go bad. Afterwards my wingman told me “Man those bitches are ugly anyways, let’s find someone else.” We kept going and found ourselves even better women later.
The golden rule is whoever approaches the girls and picks them up, gets first pick. So don’t be bitching about getting the fat chick if your buddy made the moves ;).
5. Don’t drink too much
Self-explanatory.
6. Timeline
Approach -> Talk -> Dance -> Get her phone # -> Go somewhere with her.
You approach the women with whatever opener you have. You talk to her a bit and engage her. When a song I like comes on I tell her I love this songs. “Let’s go dance” and take her hand to the dance floor.
The dance floor is something that comes with experience and hard to put into words. But basically you make small advances towards her and see what her limits are. I’ve had success making out with women on the dance floor, but the majority of them just want to dance at this stage. After dancing I take her back to where my friends are and we all drink. Talk to her a bit more and get her phone number. The clubs usually close at 2 or 3am and I always go out and eat with my friends, so I will invite her along. After that the rest is up to you.
Clubbing can be intimidating for anyone that’s going there for the first time. But like all things, you’ll improve with experience.